HOW I BECAME A CHEESE SMUGGLER


Quesooo

Most of my really close friends know I’m lactose intolerant, which means I cannot eat any kind of freaking cheese at all!!

I became lactose intolerant years back when I decided to give up antibiotics and nasty growth hormones pumped into cows, which then end up in our bodies when we drink that nasty white liquid called milk. Yuuuck!! Some experts even say we are NOT supposed to drink milk past our breast feeding days!! Please google it, youtube it or Wikipedia it, if you want to learn more. I even included some links for you to get started.

Ok let’s get back to my cheese please. ;))


Cousin's store =)
Yes, I am lactose intolerant forever and ever, which means no cheese in my diet. At least, that is what I thought, until I ran into Queso Doble Crema at my cousin’s mini market in Mexico. I was feeling adventurous that day and decided what the heck, I’ll try some and see what happens! Well, I had the most fantastic food orgasmic experience, if there ever was one, which of course led me to eat tons of this amazing Queso. That’s when I knew I was in trouble! I was going to be sooo sick later, but like my mom says, “ya lo bailado nadie te lo quita!” Then a miracle happened. I never got sick! Not one bit, not at all! Yuuppiiieee!!!

If you have not had the pleasure yet, let me say that Queso doble crema is the most delicious cheese you will ever taste in your life!! It is soo rich and creamy and delicious and perfect especially spread on a warm corn tortilla. I am so sure about this that I dare anyone of my French buddies to give me a taste of their favorite cheese to change my mind, but I can assure you, Queso Doble Crema can whip French cheese ass anytime. Oh yeah!! Maybe if I say it slowly you can understand my delight a little better…Queee-so Dooo-ble Creee-maaa…that’s right let it roll off your tongue ever so gently. Yummylicious!

So as I said before I was still a little nervous about going home. But when I met Queso Doble Crema and my cousin gave me 1 kilo (2lbs) to take home, my nervousness was gone and all I could think about was how the hell I was going to smuggle some of my precious Queso back to the States!!

Nicaragua Bus
Before I didn’t have to worry about weight because I would just take buses from place to place, but this time I was flying home! Planes equal checked in baggage plus carry on, which means limit on weight, which sucks because I was trying to bring back some other souvenirs as well, plus my laptop, camera & of course my violin!

So I went online and read the list of items not allowed as carry on and Queso was not on it. Cool! My cousins tried to tell me I should not worry about it. Yes, they said, just carry it on the plane with you. They doubted anyone would take away my cheese at the airport.

But as daring as I had been during my trip I was not about to risk it this time. Hell no!!

What if they decided my Queso Doble Crema was a threat to national security?? Anyone remember that lady who was trying to carry on breast milk in a bottle for her baby and they made her taste it to prove it wasn’t some type of chemical weapon!! Poor baby went hungry cause the lady had to get rid of the breast milk after it touched her lips. If they thought breast milk was a threat, can you imagine what they would say about my Queso?? I was sure they would find some way to prevent me from taking my Queso on board with me?? Nooo way, my cheese had to be secure 100% nothing less!

Toluca corner store
I asked the nice man at the corner store to weigh my soon to be check-in bag on his scale. It was over by 13 lbs!! Wow, I had to leave some stuff behind, but what? I did not have much clothes as it was. I really wanted to keep my hammock, my tent was awesome and yes all my books were too important to leave behind!

Mmmm…I decided I could give up my tent. I needed to buy a smaller one anyway and could just give it to one of my nephews. I weighted my bag again but was still over by 10 lbs. Agh! Fine, I would leave behind my Central America travel guide, which I did not need anymore, but had been a special gift. Sigh!

I weighted again. Damn still 7 lbs over! This time I gave away some more clothes and toiletries, including my emergency kit, to my younger cousin.

I shifted, re-organized and moved stuff from my check-in into my carry-on bag, until I was able to fit 1 kilo of the most delicious cheese you will ever find in this world, Queso Doble Crema! J

When I finally arrived to the airport and was waiting in line to check in my luggage, I felt a bit uneasy & began to think. Please don’t let them find my Queso! Please don’t let them find my Queso!

Ripped but good ;)
The attendant asked me if I was sure all my stuff would stay inside my bag, it was really falling apart by now and had a huge hole. After sewing my travel bag a few times during my trip to try to prolong its life, it was now suffering a slow painful death. The pressure from my sleeping bag, which fit very tight inside my bag acted as some sort of plug and was the only reason I was able to keep the rest of my stuff from falling out.

Of course I immediately answered, yes it will be fine, fearing the attendant would discover my Queso if she opened my bag!

She did not think it would make it, gave my bag a second look and as I nervously waited to see what she would do next, she proceeded to put tape all around my bag just to be sure nothing would fall out! Haha!

My Queso Doble Crema was now 100% safe!

No one would get in between us now ;))))

Success!!!!! =)))

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